Shooting People In The Face

I like shooting people. There, I’ve admitted it. I like nothing better than the visceral thrill of sneaking up behind somebody, pistol in hand, and putting a sunroof in the back of their skull. I’m often to also be found selecting a fast car to carjack then speeding through the streets, knocking people over and committing drive-bys with a semi-automatic. If I’m not on Earth then I’m frequently stalking the corridors of a mutant infested derelict spaceship, merrily blowing the limbs off of any creature that attacks me, watching in delight as it writhes at my feet. Why do I do these things? Because, at 38, I’m old enough to, that’s why.

BBC License Fleece

 I recently upgraded to Sky+ HD, having had a compatible TV for some months but not the finances to afford it. I was looking forward to watching so many shows in stunning tiny pixelvision, many on the BBC. Oddly, considering the cost of the license fee, the BBC seems to be rather complacent about offering HD content.

Where Doctor Who goes wrong

Let's be honest; children with knives and/or other instruments liable to cause injury are scary. Without said items they become merely miniature versions of us, albeit oddly louder and often more insufferable.

Premature Retailisation

I ventured into my local Sainsbury's today. Not a particularly unusual event for me, I'm often to be found in there as I have no life. What I saw this afternoon beggars belief; it's only September 10th and they already have a large display of Halloween merchandise on sale.

Arrogance at the wheel

Right, first proper post and it's a poo flinger - so we're off to a good start!

I live in North London. I drive a small car. I very often give way to oncoming traffic when the road is restricted, even when the highway code would dictate I have right of way. I wasn't aware that flashing your headlights, smiling or raising a friendly hand in recognition costs money.